World After Terror
by Koros45
Summary: What do you do after everything ends? You go home. Platonic Shinji Asuka


Koros45 doesn't own End of Evangelion

World After Terror

There was a mountain of unsaid things between the two sitting on the beach, staring at the giant half-face of Rei Ayanami submerged in the orange fluid, the half smile on her face eerie.

"We should go home." Shinji said.

Asuka thought for sure she would be the one to take charge, but Shinji stood, his back to her as he stared at the ocean ahead of them. She did not want to admit he was in the right for anything at the moment and she had plenty of reason to feel that way – yet Shinji was right. This atmosphere. The changes in everything. The things that had happened leading up to this. She wanted to leave it.

Asuka found she was breathing deeply, glad that she was still alive despite everything. She turned from Shinji and noticed Misato's necklace hanging on a makeshift grave. Shinji's handiwork no doubt.

"Then let's go." Asuka said, her voice sounding far more tired than she thought it would.

Instrumentality. She'd seen and felt everything Shinji had. They had seen each others' soul, the good and the bad. And it had been overwhelming. As much as she found herself angry at Shinji, she still cared for him. But she didn't want to say anything to him at the moment.

She took a few steps forward and was initially angry at him for not keeping pace. Then she noticed he was right behind her, arms swaying as he staggered. His hand looked like it was reaching out to her and Asuka was surprised at herself for a second time.

She didn't rebuke him, Shinji noticed. He was struggling to walk away from it all – to say he'd come back later once he was ready. But Asuka was just as far gone as he was and Shinji didn't want them getting separated – not after all that happened. He took a fast start and his foot got caught in the sand and he imagined he must've made a fool of himself staggering towards her. But she took his hand all the same.

She looked at him and once again Shinji couldn't tell what was going through her head. It was a relief actually. Now that they had some actual privacy in their own heads. They walked down the dark and cracked streets.

The walk was quiet as both of them were exhausted. The two of them had the same rhythm as they looked for Misato's former place.

"I don't want to let go." Shinji said to her.

Asuka closed her eye but nodded. "I understand. Just . . . I . . . you need to earn my trust back again."

Shinji's grip was about to loosen but Asuka tightened her own grip on his fingers.

"Shinji, I want you to earn my trust back. After what happened I – I can see why you acted the way you did. But you know that doesn't excuse it." Asuka pointed out.

"Of course you could say the same to me, now that you've seen inside me too." She said, sighing and pulling on his arm.

"Hold my hand if you want. Just my hand. I need you to respect that, Shinji." Asuka said to him.

"I know. And I'm sorr-" he stopped for a moment. "-I'll respect that." He said.

Then they found Misato's place and walked in. Immediately the feeling of being isolated on an alien feeling world evaporated as they were in a space they could call home.

Asuka sighed. "Ugh! I stink in this plug-suit." She fiddled with the light switch but nothing came on. "There's no power, so how the hell am I supposed to wash it?"

"That's OK. I'll handwash it for you." Shinji said.

Then another door opened and Pen-Pen waddled out to grab a snack. The penguin waddled back and honked at them before closing the door.

"Well at least Pen-Pen's ok." Shinji said and Asuka nodded.

"I guess we'll have to make do with just the stuff in here for a while. Till then I'm going to change. We'll wash our clothes later." Asuka said.

She went into her room and came out with a T-Shirt and some shorts in her arms, walking to the bath room. Shinji took the time to change into his own softer t-shirt and shorts, hanging up his white shirt in his closet.

"Hey, are you hungry?" He heard Asuka ask him.

He opened his eyes to see her with her hands on her hips, looking down at him with curiosity from her good eye. She'd changed and was giving him a look that seemed to say 'I'm hungry but not hungry enough to make anything myself'.

"Right. We need to eat." Shinji said. He stood up and suddenly his expression became panicked.

"Oh crap! No power! No refrigerator or freezer! All of Misato's stuff is going bad!"

Asuka snorted as Shinji leapt out of the bed and ran through the kitchen, throwing open the doors and taking out anything that wasn't a beverage.

"Bad, bad bad! All this is bad." Shinji said, stacking it on the table.

Asuka smiled watching him antagonize over the small thing, but still knew it was a good idea to get rid of the stuff before the smell and other complications got to them.

Shinji turned and they both froze. It was the same table in the shared consciousness they had seen. When he first strangled her inside their shared space. He stopped what he was doing and sat down, the task at hand immediately forgotten as he started shaking.

"Shinji?" Asuka asked, her expression showing she knew exactly what was going through his head.

"I kept screwing up. Over and over again. I thought I could make things right. But I still hurt you, Asuka." Shinji said, glaring at his hands.

"You made things right in the end." Asuka said. She pulled out a chair and sat across from him.

"Shinji, didn't you say that life was worth living? Even if you get hurt or mess up?" Asuka asked, leaning across the table and past the stacked expired food to put a hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah. I did. But knowing that I really hurt you twice is still a lot to process. Knowing I hurt you too is hard to -" Shinji put his head in his hands and became immobile in his frustration at himself.

Asuka sighed. "Don't you know I feel the same? It doesn't excuse what you did to me but- " She stopped.

She seemed to struggle with the next few words. "-but I also have to do better. Since we got up on the beach you didn't do anything perverted to me. You didn't hurt me. So I think I can trust you now. I – I think that seeing each other's souls like that was really hard. But maybe it was also a good thing."

Shinji was quietly sobbing but he nodded and stood up, wiping his eyes and looked out the window.

"We must be exhausted. I'm going to my room."

"Can I come in with you?" Asuka asked, grabbing his hand before he left the table.

Shinji said nothing but turned to her with wide eyes. Not scared, but surprised. He gave a small nod and let her to his room.

The sun had set and once again the moon hung over the world. Out the window they could hear the orange ocean's churn as the waves kept moving.

"Did you want me to make room?" Shinji asked, flopping face down on the bed and stretching out.

"I want to be closer to you, Shinji. If you're ok with that." Asuka responded, flopping down next to him. Shinji grunted but didn't say no.

"Hey, roll over. I want to see your face." Asuka said and Shinji did as she wanted.

He looked tired. But soft. And relieved.

"I want - to be held." Asuka said, looking at him with a mix of wounded pride and wanting. Shinji nodded and she embraced him, shoving her head into his chest.

"This is sudden, Asuka." Shinji said as he winced, wrapping his arms around her upper back.

"I know this is sudden but I need to be this open with you, Shinji." Asuka said to him. "A need to be close to someone. To open up to them." She said and he nodded, knowing full well what she meant by that. She started trembling while he held her.

"Asuka?" Shinji asked.

"I'm ok." She said, taking a few moments to speak again.

"I wanted this for so long. To be held. For someone to notice me. But I didn't say anything. I thought I had to be strong on my own. And I just- pushed everyone away. Acted like I was better than them."

"But you had your reasons why." Shinji said.

"I guess. We both saw ourselves only as EVA pilots to get everyone's approval. To feel bigger than we do inside." She said.

"Well I – even if we're not pilots anymore, I still care about you." Shinji said.

Asuka nodded, moving away and pulling her arms back so they both could have their own space.

"It took me long enough to recognize that. See you tomorrow." She said, turning away to face the wall.

"Night, Shinji." Asuka said.

"Night, Asuka." Shinji replied, giving a smile as the sleep set in.

Then the two lay there for a new day that would certainly come.

Author's note: This was originally going to be way more Shinji/Asuka but two depressed teens that have issues with each other wouldn't just snap back into how things were before EoE. I hope even with that said, them touching each other at the end didn't feel out of character. The ending of EoE was so open-ended but Shinji and Asuka have a lot to work through to re-gain each other's trust, especially in Shinji's case. I was conflicted because I wanted something fluff without going overboard. I could see Shinji and Asuka as a possible couple but it would take a long time for that to happen and I'm more interested in a platonic friendship first. Shinji's still getting over Kaworu being dead and what he did to Asuka and the human race as a whole. Please leave a review and let me know what you think.


End file.
